Monday 18 July 2016

Feeling like a failure...all over again.

I am now working as a tax consultant. It is stressful and overwhelming at times, especially when I get something wrong.

It doesn't help that I have been physically ill for the past few days (including vomiting at home a couple of times) so struggled to get through the days at work. I just feel awful. I thought I would be working six days this week and every second week but when I saw the appointment times I am not working on Thursday I don't believe and I got a call last night from my boss saying I won't be working today because my one client has moved.

I feel slightly guilty at the relief I felt over that. I just need the rest!

Then there are my screw ups at work, like giving the client last year's estimate to take home instead of this year's. I put the correct one in the mail to send to her as she didn't have an email address listed. Then the other day I didn't give a client all the deductions he could have had because of a rule I applied across the board which was wrong. I felt horrible but thought that was the only client I did that to.

Then at work yesterday I saw a client's comments on my work saying I was very unsure and even incorrect in my calculations. They thought I may need a course or tuition on tax law or a review by a senior member of staff. She gave me a 2/10. Given how sick I was feeling already, reading that just made it worse. Then my boss spoke to me about it and was very nice. She confirmed for me which deductions I need to apply that rule to. I think I know which client it was and I think I know what happened.

I still feel awful for screwing up that badly. There were a few other client comments listed and mostly 10/10s but I don't think any of those were my clients.

This week has been pretty awful!

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